Co-Dependency

Co-dependency is the dynamic in a relationship where I expect the other person to cake care of me, and/or I take it upon myself to care for the other person’s needs, wants and desires. Co-dependency masquerades as deep, abiding love, however this is not the case. In reality, co-dependency is about being irresponsible for my own needs, and “getting” someone else to meet them for me. Co-dependency is a co-addictive behavioral pattern which allows inappropriate behavior (such as addictions) to be present in the relationship.

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Care-Taking

Care-taking behavior is a specific type of co-dependency where I want to “care for” another person, however if I genuinely reflect on my motive, I will find that I want to “take” something in return. I have an expectation. I expect a “thank you” or a comment about what a good worker I am, or I expect that the neighbor will let me borrow his boat because I let him borrow our car. My true motive is to get / take from others. Often, when I care-take, I will jump in and do for others what they can and need to do for themselves. I limit their growth because I want a particular outcome.

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